Down in the Clouds
by Seaneta
Summary: A series of short stories surrounding a relationship between Bruce/Batman and the Joker. Slash.
1. Umbrella

**Down in the Clouds**

**Disclaimer and Warning:** Property of Warner Bros, DC Comics, Christopher Nolan, Legendary Films. This is slash fanfiction.

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The billionaire looked into the window of the small diner on a Gotham street corner. The Joker watched him stare and traced his gaze to a couple being seated. They looked normal enough, but-oh. The woman was obviously that Emily chick, Bruce's most current and recently steady girl he's been seeing . And it was also obvious she was on some kind of date with the guy she was with, who caressed her arm and looked at her lovingly.

Wayne let out an exhausted sigh. "Why do I even date?" He continued walking down the near empty sidewalk. A heavy storm was approaching and most of Gotham's citizens were huddled inside.

"Oh come on," The brown eyed male commented, "she couldn't have meant _that_ much to you."

"She was down to Earth. And sometimes funny."

He gave the taller male a look.

"I _like_ to think I have a sense of humor. But that isn't the point," he opened his umbrella, feeling the first few drops of rain. "I'd just like to meet someone who isn't trying to kill me, has a thing for cats*, or thinks I'm as dumb as I pretend to be."

The Joker wordlessly took his umbrella and held it for the both of them, mindlessly twirling it within his grip. "Well, maybe if you weren't so predictable all the time," he flicked the black colored sunshade, "oh darling, you know that's what I love about you. And who needs such bores when you have somebody like me to spice things up a bit?"

"Trying to detain you while saving an elementary school isn't spicing things up."

"Oh, why use _that_ example? Children are inherently unfunny when they die."

"Then why did you try?"

"Because I had to do it eventually. There are only so many buildings in Gotham."

A rumble of thunder cracked over the city as the pair walked along.

"Why don't you just make me into your next public fling?"

Wayne cracked a genuine smile and glanced over at the man without his usual make-up, green tinted strands, and latex covered scars. "Because, the moment I allow you into the spotlight as my date, you'd do something terrible."

"Somebody's a pessimist."

"And somebody is mass murderer."

"You just _cannot_ let that go." He comically sighed. "Hey-hey, I saw yet another smile!" He poked his arm, "wow, that must be some kind of record."

Bruce only glanced back over at him, finding his poker face.

"See, I _can_ be a good influence."

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Read and Review, thank you : )

Author's Note: My intentions for this "story" are numerous pieces of drabbles, little shorts. For very short shorts, I may combine multiple pieces for longer chapters. Let me know what you think, I'm always open for suggestions, themes, how I can improve.

* - Reference to Selina Kyle.


	2. Bonding

Bonding

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An old school building. The Joker wanted their next meeting to be in this abandoned elementary school, it seemed. Wayne knew of it from newspapers but more prominently from his father. Thomas tried to restore it when it had to close due to insufficient renovations, but his funding went to the political game instead to keep the corrupt out of his company board members. When the wealthy Thomas Wayne had to pull out, everybody else did; the school was doomed.

Wayne stepped out of his black Lamborghini, deliberately parking behind overgrown bushes to avoid any wanderers looking for a new ride. He didn't want to make any noises as he stepped on the cracked pavement, so he chose a back entrance. Even if he looked like Bruce Wayne, he could still make arrive with Batman's stealth. There was evidence of locks once being on the old door, which probably meant the Joker was already here. He took the flimsy piece of paper out of his jacket.

_ Room 213_

After walking down dark hallways, Bruce got to the door and looked through the small and incredibly dusty window. Squinting, he could only make out a hazy silhouette of a man sitting at a large desk. Bruce had the overpowering urge to leave, to just get back in his car and drive away. He immediately pushed those thoughts far in the back of his head, before it could get any worse with the possibility of hearing Rachel's disapproving voice, or imagining his dead parents turning away.

The door creaked when he opened it a little to quickly, and the Joker looked over as he continued to shuffle playing cards at the large writing desk. The entire classroom was unbelievably dusty and aged. What little light there was came from a small, modern lamp on the desk; does he come here often? Bruce wondered. Some of the desks were overturned, and the two windows on the other side were just as filthy as the glass on the door. Located on the second floor as well, being seen by someone should be the least of his worries. But it wasn't. Not with such delicate situations these were for him.

"You made it." He looked up at the taller male, cards unmoving in his gloved hands. "La_te_, but ya _made_ it." His greeting in return was silence as he stepped inside. "Oh, please, take a seat, take a seat." He grinned.

Awkwardly, Bruce did. There was a normal sized chair across from the Joker already, but it looked just as old as the rest of the place. It was a miracle it didn't crumble. "So?" He looked around, "why this place?"

"Hm, not really sure to be honest." He put his cards inside his jacket. "Sometimes I use this place as a hide out. I think it's because I went to school here once."

"Really?" He raised an eyebrow. Getting information about his past was a rare occurrence.

"Maybe," he shrugged, dismissing it. "the memories come and go. Of course," he chuckled and tapped his head, "maybe it's just making things up." The green haired male reached into a plastic bag under the desk and placed a bottle of liquor on the table. "You drink?"

"I try not to." He eyed the moving liquid in the bottle. This was odd of the clown. But, then again, what was normal of him? The Joker took out two glasses and poured. "With you though, I seem to break a lot of my rules."

He chuckled as a glass was passed towards him. "_All _but one. So tell me, darling, what did you do today?"

"Don't-don't do that," he looked across the desk, drinking some, "don't mock what this is.

"What is…_this_?" The Joker questioned, taking a gulp of his own. The billionaire didn't hear any sort of malice within his voice, so he in turn wasn't aggressive.

"This is Bruce Wayne. Drinking with The Joker. In a discarded elementary school. At three in the morning."

"So…would you feel more comfortable if you were Batman?"

"Actually," Wayne thought, "I'd be more comfortable if you didn't wear your make-up."

The clown giggled, pouring more drink into their cups. "You'd like that, eh? Then it'd be Bruce Wayne and _some guy_ drinking in a discarded elementary school at three in the morning."

"I'm just-" he felt his body begin to warm from his drink, "concerned. The last thing I need is somebody blackmailing me or going to the media. Plus, I do these things without my mask. You should to."

"Oh, so now it's you do, I do. Well, tell ya what. How about I come to you al naturel next time, hm?" A shrug. "So, come on, come on, let's hear about that day."

Wayne looked at him for a few seconds, then sighed. "You seem pretty committed," he said quietly, watching the male pour him another around.

"I'm fighting for a noble cause," The Joker clinked his glass against Bruce's and watched him take another swallow . "You might even out-drink me, sweetheart."

Bruce felt the corners of his lips want to slide up, but he managed to prevent a smile from forming. "I wouldn't be too sure about that. I think you had the record beat a year ago."

The clown let out a burst of laughter, recalling the night Batman tried to apprehend him at the top of the clock tower, himself shit-faced drunk. It was obvious the caped crusader was taken back at first, but tried to play it off like he didn't notice the odor of alcohol. The Joker's drunken remarks about the dark knight's lack of a good lay were harder to ignore, as well as his attempt to sing Bryan Adam's _Everything I Do, I Do It For You. _And when Batman reluctantly questioned where the bomb was, his answer was the Joker vomiting on his combat boots. "Oh, _darling_," he laughed between words, "You were in _such_ sour spirits that night."

Bruce continued to watch the Joker's reaction to the memory as he took more sips, trying even harder not to smile or, worse yet, laugh with him. When his composure returned, the brunet replied, "I had to clean the smell out of my suit afterwards. And it didn't help that your threat was a bluff. What made you drink so much anyway?"

"Oh, I was celebrating _Brrrruce_. You never found it odd I paid Bruce Wayne a visit about a week later?" Now it was the Joker's turn to gauge his reaction.

"You found out my identity before then?" Leaning back in his creaking chair, Bruce finished his glass. "Of course I found it _odd_. I found the situation alarming and distressing too. I'm normally not kidnapped so easily, nor do I wake up under such precarious circumstances."

"Oh?" The clown grinned in interest and gave each of their glasses a generous refill. Bruce was struggling with his poker face.

"It's really not the thing to talk about."

"Oh, no, no, no, I got you this intoxicated, the least you can do is speak in full sentences for me."

"You were waving your dick in my face," he deadpanned, the words continuing to flow out of his mouth even though he wasn't quite sure why. "and even though you had me chained down in every way possible, you didn't gag me. What were you expecting to happen? That I would perform fellatio on you? I would have bit it off."

The Joker hyperventilated then, clutching his head so it couldn't bounce against the wooden desk. His laughter exploding with doubled force, Wayne knew what he was immediately reminded of; one of their early 'episodes' in a warehouse. The clown, high with pure ecstasy, tried to force his cock into his unwilling mouth a few months ago. But when Bruce bared his teeth with a snarl, the green haired man quickly let the idea go. "Good...good thing," he continued to laugh, "…that I didn't…" the Joker was laughing so steadily he never finished his sentence. "Oh _you_", the male looked across the table with an adoring smile. Bruce finally indulged himself with a chuckle, their close shadows flickering against the wall.

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Feedback is appreciated. Thanks for reading:)


	3. Conversation with a Stranger

Personas

(A/N: Once my finals week wraps up, I should be producing more drabbles and, hopefully, more continuous/chaptered stories.)

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The odd pair shuffled along a busy Gotham sidewalk with their recent liquor purchase. Although it was nice to get some fresh air and spend some time together, Bruce couldn't help but limit his glances to the man he was walking with. This situation was growing difficult for the billionaire to accept, let alone get used too, and confirming the fact it was, indeed, the Joker, walking beside him was a reminder he didn't want at the moment.

They made their way across the Narrows bridge and into the shadier part of the city, but did not feel uneasy. Even if somebody was stupid enough to mug two grown men, Bruce and Joker could take care of themselves when they weren't, well, _themselves_. But, Bruce mused, it was needless to always walk everywhere, even with Jokers' apartment within a few blocks. With a vehicle, he wouldn't have to wear sunglasses or dress in casual attire. Wouldn't have to worry about somebody recognizing the infamous Bruce Wayne under his disheveled hair.

"Maybe I should invest in a car for when we need to…go out." He adjusted his cap. "I don't like hats."

"Says somebody who wears a mask every night," the jester chuckled. "Why, can't stand being seen in public with a _perfectly normal_ fella?"

His wild eyes and flash of yellow teeth seemed to counter his statement, but Bruce didn't say anything to it. "It'll be faster getting around." he shrugged. "Anyway, you mentioned something about tonight?"

"_Oh_, right. Tonight. Well, since today has been such a crazy day with our shopping and sight seeing, I thought we could do something even _crazier_ and-"

"_Jay_!" The sudden shout came seemingly from nowhere, but once the pair turned around, a skinny blonde was walking up to them.

"_Shit_," the shorter male mumbled and Bruce turned his eyes on him accusingly.

"Who-?"

"Jay! I can't believe you're out…here!" The woman exclaimed with a genuine smile. "I haven't seen you in days." Her skinny framed wrapped around the Joker's day clothes, stepping back but continued to caress his shoulder.

"Well…you know me, doll face. I don't really, uh, keep a schedule." He flicked her arm off. Bruce was amazed. Did the Joker, _the_ Joker, a mass murdering criminal, actually look uncomfortable?

"Oh, Jay, I-" She paused, finally acknowledging the other man in her presence. "I'm sorry, we haven't met. Who are you?" Her ruby red lips frowned.

"Mark Thomas," he held out his hand but the woman didn't take it. "Pleased to meet you…."

"I go by Harley." Her blue blues flickered towards the blonde male, "Jay here didn't mention he had any _friends_." Rummaging around her red purse, she continued, "and I've been with cha for a _long_ time, haven't I darling?" She flashed a smile.

Bruce's eyes narrowed into slits. "No, actually, I'm not quite a friend." He played it cool and slightly confused, quickly adopting into his clueless persona. "I was actually just trying to figure out where the closest subway was. I seem to have taken the wrong detour."

"Yeah, I can tell this area isn't really your scene," Harley said, and pulled out a lighter and cigarette.

"Thanks for your help by the way," Bruce gestured to the other man and shook his limp hand goodbye. Joker looked at him uneasily. "I _really _appreciate you letting me know." The phrase had an ominous double-meaning for the clown, but it wasn't something he could bluntly bring up with Harley around. But with his Bat leaving (for now, mind you), at least he could take care of the wench.

Harley blew a puff of smoke in Bruce's direction as he headed off, walking across the street and heading down another block or two. The billionaire knew where the metro was, and he walked fast eager to leave the Joker alone with that blonde.

A homeless man attempted to grab his pants sleeve but he jerked away, his temper rising with every second he got closer to the station. Is that Harley some other goon of his? A prostitute he employs? For fucks sake, the Joker better have a good reason, Bruce thought walking down the terminal steps.

"Hey, babe, wanna smoke?" The woman asked sweetly, starting to dig around for another cigarette.

"Uh, how about no?" The Joker stated with an intense glare.

"What a fucking dip shit," Harley sucked on her stick, ignoring the clown's obvious distain, "That guy just seriously walked up to the first person he saw?" She gave a closer look at his face, "well, that _is_ pretty good latex. I probably couldn't even tell you were you without that hair!" She gave a deep laugh.

The Joker gave a soured expression as he began to speak, "You-"

"-What? Oh, _oh_ fuck, were you going to kill him or some shit? Fuck, I'm sorry," she gave an exaggerated frown, "We should have a code word or something for that."

"Uh, no, Harls, I wasn't going to kill him. But ya _did_ mess something up." Oh, if looks could kill. "I have some business I need to attend to. How about you go back _home_ and I'll deal with you later? Hm?" He grinned. Oh the possibilities he could think of for a punishment. Absolutely no one destroys his time with his bat.

"But Jay, I haven't seen you-" His gloved finger firmly pressed against her lips.

"Leave now and I won't kill you right now." He raised his eyebrows. The girl blushed and giggled, understanding completely. As she turned around, the blonde blew him a kiss.

Bruce wasn't that surprised when he exited the subway station near his penthouse and saw that the Joker was already there, waiting for him against a pillar. Soundlessly, Bruce walked up to him and gave a look.

"What can I say? I'm a charmer," Joker lifted his hands up in the air, "I didn't know she'd be there."

"She recognized you without your make-up."

"Well, I don't just have _guys_ working for me, and she used to help me on some heists…." a sudden, comical gasp, "Is Bats _jealous_?"

"I'm _not_ jealous. But…" he blinked, "yeah, I **am** pissed at you. This arrangement is fucked up enough. And now you're also _with_ somebody else?" Bruce couldn't find it in himself to say fucking somebody else. Describing their situation as odd was an understatement and playing the betrayed wife role wouldn't help either. "It's not like I'm fucking any of my dates when I make appearances. If our _rounds_ aren't enough-"

The Joker roughly shoved him against the closest brick wall, dropping the two grocery bags. With his gloved hands holding his by his side, he growled, "I'm. _**Not**_. How do you think I manage to escape Arkham? She _works_ there. I've kept her around because she's slightly more capable than any of my other men." He released Bruce for a short moment before pushing him back into the wall. His gaze was deadly, but Bruce matched it.

"The next time I see _anyone_ touch you like _that_ again," referring to Harley's stroking of his shoulder, "I will _not_ care about any persona I'm maintaining. I'll break their arm."

The clown wordlessly kissed the man against the wall and released him. "Ah, yes, the spoiled child comes out to play." He chuckled. "I'll take note of that, Brucey."

"Good." He deadpanned, regaining his composer. The odd pair shuffled out and joined the small crowd of sidewalk traffic.

"You know, I did fuck her once. It was_ horrible_."

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**A/N: As always, reviews are encouraged and welcomed :) **


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